Mrs You And Me
by El Juno
Summary: Short 'n' Fluffy 'n' Silly. Names and marriage, Katharine Hepburn and Lauren Bacall and what it means to be Romeo when you're Motomiya Daisuke. Daikari, Yaoi, Yuri.


The title of this puppy is taken from a Smoking Popes song on the Angus soundtrack.

Consider this a late Valentines Day fic, if you MUST.

This is supposed to be short, silly and fluffy. Very much so on all counts.

And, I think it ruins a bit of the ending, but there are homosexual themes in here, in varying directions. (Like this SURPRISES you, when the story's from me?)

And, of course, none of the characters in here BELONG to me, though they will be returned unharmed. If you're all good.

And, considering that a major issue of the story revolves around it, I suppose this is important to say. In Japan, the woman doesn't automatically take the man's name at marriage (Not really in America, either...my mother kept her maiden name, for instance.) There's a set of rules that decides which name the new couple takes, and their children, which basically boils down to "Who would you move in with?"

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Daisuke's mind was whirling, and it was vitally important.

He was trying on names.

Motomiya Hikari, or Yagami Daisuke?

Hmm.

He'd been doing it almost all day, but especially now, as he almost skipped down the walk to Hikari's house, trying to kill the feeling of being very, very silly with an admittedly-sillier activity. But, then again, he was carrying one (1) blood-red rose (the flower of love in the western language of flowers, or so Sora had told him as she'd sold it to him) one (1) box of the finest chocolates 750 yen could buy, and was wearing the tie that Jun had told him was the most vital part of the ensemble of LUV. Honestly, really, what girl could resist any of it?

Look-ing-good.

Definitely not silly.

You see, this all had to be Special. And Important. And Not Silly. For this was the day he Confessed his Love to Darling Hikari. And we all know that the Confession of Love is the real beginning of every nice Romantic Happy Ending. And for the marriage-happy-ending (church bells ringing as he and Hikari walked out from the chapel and doves flew away...Jun had made him watch a goodly number of Romantic Endings before she'd show him how to tie the tie.) the name was important. Vitally so.

Really, they had to figure out if their first son would be Yagami Osamu or Motomiya Osamu. He'd promised Ken that he'd name his first son that...well, promised him without really telling him. It felt like the kind of thing that would make Ken smile if he knew, but he'd never really gotten around to telling him. Well, once he figured out the kid's family name, he'd tell Ken it all, and maybe he'd smile. But Ken wasn't important right now, was he? Not that he was unimportant...never so...

ACK! Brainache!

Back on subject.

He had to figure out names. He supposed Hikari's family might be richer, and Yagami Daisuke had a certain ring, but Motomiya Hikari worked, too.

Yagami Daisuke sounded like a good name for a soccer player, he supposed. And he was the bestest soccer player Odaiba had ever seen...really! (Obviously not all of Tokyo yet, because despite trying many, many times, he still could only beat Ken around 2 out of every five times, with one being a tie...Ken wasn't the one that worked here.) Anyway, Yagami Daisuke worked okay.

But Motomiya Hikari was more...it made him think of Hikari sitting happily in a flowered bower and an angelic white dress while their perfect children frolicked around her feet and she smiled. Pretty.

Confusing.

Yagami Daisuke.

Motomiya Hikari.

He'd walked around the block almost 3 times now. It wasn't that he didn't want to do this, no, not at all. But...

Heh!

He'd have to do something soon, though. The rose was starting to wilt, slightly, and his chocolates were starting to melt.

Yes, then.

For now and always, and Darling Hikari!

His rapid rush up the stairs almost bowled over an elderly lady. Daisuke didn't notice, didn't care. Love does that! Though, he did notice when the chocolates fell from his hand and hit the floor, scuffing the box slightly. Well...yes. Love does that, too, I suppose. Love does many things.

Love, for instance, forces you up stairs quickly, and causes you to run in and toe off your shoes before you announce your presence, then causes you to bang on the door and call "Hello?" as you step up.

The face that greeted the love-struck young Romeo (in his tie and carrying his chocolate and rose) was very familiar.

Unfortunately, it was bespectacled and surrounded with purple hair.

"Miyako. Um...hi. Is Hi..."

"Yes, Hikari is here." We should comment now that our love struck young Romeo noticed that Inoue Miyako (handmaid to the fair Hikari...or something to that tune. She could be a bridesmaid, Daisuke supposed. Ken was Best Man, of course) looked notably unhappy. In fact, she looked downright steamed. Especially when those eyes caught sight of the flower (slightly wilted) and the box of chocolate (slightly battered.) Well, whatever. Lovers have no time to worry about such things! Lovers only worry about their beloveds, of course.

"Can I talk to her?"

Miyako rolled her eyes, then turned around and shouted over her shoulder. "Hikari? You have a visitor."

A suitor! Couldn't Miyako see that he'd come to pay court? Couldn't she see his tie?

Hikari apparently couldn't see his tie, either. Well, or maybe she just hadn't read the script. For a proper happy ending, the lady being courted should dress in a long, frilly dress, with a bonnet and ribbons, or maybe the kind of sundress that gets torn just SO on African cruises. Not a pair of jeans and a somewhat battered sweater. "Daisuke? What is it?"

"Well, um..." Daisuke shot Miyako a glance. A pointed glance. Miyako should have been elsewhere by now. "Um...you know..."

"Daisuke?"

"Hey, Hikari..." He slowly started to hold the flower and chocolates out, and with a dashing and completely-not-silly grin said "Do you like the idea of the name 'Motomiya Hikari'?"

Dead silence. In retrospect, Daisuke decided that that was a distinctly stupid line. But, of course, it didn't matter as long as...

Darling Hikari wasn't saying anything. She looked to be going slightly ashen. That wasn't...

"Yagami Daisuke works too, you know!" Daisuke spat out quickly. "I mean, I don't care either way...I'm a...either way's cool...whichever one you like, y'know...Yagami Daisuke, Motomiya Hikari, what do I care...I mean, though...you like it?"

"Do I...like it?" Hikari said, slowly. She had a somewhat guilty look on her face. "Do I...Daisuke..."

Daisuke smiled, looked up expectantly.

Hikari reached over, slowly, and took Miyako's hand. "Honestly, Daisuke, and it's nothing against you, I prefer the sound of 'Inoue Hikari'."

To our young would-be Don Juan's credit, he dropped neither the flower nor the chocolates.

*************

Our young won't be Romeo found himself, less than half an hour later, sitting at the kitchen table of newly-dubbed consoler-in-chief Ichijouji Ken watching the rose wilt as he worked his way through the chocolates.

"They've been dating for a few months now, apparently." He was saying. "Can you BELIEVE it? I mean...wow."

Surprisingly, our consoler-in-chief was not doing much consoling. He was, however, helping a boy who should have been a crying wreck eat his chocolates, at least, after said boy forced them into his hand.

"Well, honestly, Daisuke..." He began, the kind of thing a consoler-in-chief SHOULD say.

"Yeah, honestly, Ken. You know what, though? *I* believe it. I mean, those two are always so..." Daisuke looked up at the ceiling, grabbing as if he thought he could pluck the word from the air. "You know...what am I saying...word...is...touchy, I guess. Y'know?" He grabbed another chocolate and grinned the grin of melting cocoa at Ken.

Ken looked more than a little confused, of course. "Daisuke...don't be so saintly. You don't have to..."

"What do you want me to do? Cry on your shoulder?" He grabbed a chocolate and forced it into Ken's hand. "That's a fool's game." He continued, suddenly quite interested in watching his friend eat chocolate. "Like this tie. This tie's a fool's game."

The tie came off and flew vaguely in Ken's direction, but did not quite hit his head. Perhaps that was Daisuke's intention, perhaps not. Ken rolled his eyes slightly, indulgently. "But you're so..."

"Fine. I'm fine."

It wasn't a lie, either. He was...fine. Almost relieved. It might have been different if any of Jun's movie fest had covered this bit, but...nothin'. This wasn't in them. If Lauren Bacall had ever ended a movie by running off with Katharine Hepburn, he might have had trouble. As it was, though.

Eh. Why worry? He was off script as it was.

It was slightly confusing, kinda, but other than that...

Yeah.

Ken was licking chocolate off his fingers. Ken didn't really like chocolate much, Daisuke knew, but he was eating it to make him happy. Ken did a lot of things to make him happy.

He did a lot of things to make Ken happy.

He was watching Ken lick his fingers, then watching the fall of hair on Ken's chin, then watching as Ken turned away and got a glass of water, and a thought occurred to him, and it was so simple that he wondered why it hadn't hit him before...maybe it was those bloody movies, again. They never covered the idea that Katharine and Lauren might be happier together than with Humphrey Bogart, and they never covered this bit.

It really was the only thing that made sense, though. Maybe he wasn't as off script as he'd thought.

"Yo, Ken?"

"Hmmm?" Ken turned back, glass in hand, slight smile on his face and glimmer in his eyes. Oh, yes. It made sense.

"Which do you think sounds better...Ichijouji Daisuke or Motomiya Ken?"

The answer wasn't doves or church bells, but as romantic endings went, Daisuke supposed it could be worse.

The glass dropped from Ken's nerveless fingers and shattered on the ground.


End file.
